Family Members Codependency Questionnaire
1. My relationships often involve people who need my help or are somehow dependent on me.
2. When I feel I've helped someone, I experience a "high" a sense of success.
3. It is important to be needed.
4. I often find myself "in the middle," giving advise, counseling others.
5. On several occasions people have become angry when I have tried to help.
6. I seem to know when bad things are about to occur.
7. I spend a lot of time thinking through or replaying scenes, trying to figure out what I can do to effect desired outcomes.
8. I seem to have difficulty starting and maintaining healthy relationships.
9. It's difficult for me to receive praise or care from others.
10. I do not like to let myself get angry. When I do, I often lose control.
11. It's difficult for me to say "No."
12. It's difficult for me to ask for things that I need. (Work, home, family.)
13. I often over commit my time or over promise myself.
14. It is hard for me to act silly, have fun or relax.
15. If I'm not productive, I feel worthless.
16. It's difficult to believe that someone could truly love me.
17. I am afraid of really allowing myself to love.
18. I am afraid of being abandoned or being alone.
19. Sometimes I think I expect to be hurt.
20. I find it easy to criticize and blame others.
21. I seem to justify or make excuses for others actions when they have hurt me.
22. When I know a relationship is about to end, I will stay in it. I will stay until I can begin another dependent relationship.
23. It is easy to make me feel guilty and accept blame. I will take responsibility for others. Somehow things end up being my fault.
24. I am not sure what normal is.
25. I often take a stand in a relationship and then go back on what I said I would do. It seems as though I get sucked in again and again.
26. My circle of friends seems to have diminished.
27. I am not aware of what I want. I ask others what they want.
28. I tend to be sick a lot. I can't seem to fight off infection.
29. There never seems to be enough time to do things just for me; things I would enjoy doing.
If you have checked "Yes" to 3 or more of these statements, you probably have a problem with codependency.
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